What Is Intellectual Freedom? – Libraries & The Right To Read

What is Intellectual Freedom?

Every person has the right to unrestricted access to information from all viewpoints, both while seeking the information out and when receiving it. Intellectual freedom offers open access to all forms of expression so that all arguments for or against a cause or movement can be examined. Intellectual Freedom is important for every individual regardless of who they are. Our democratic system is built on the principle of intellectual freedom.

We anticipate that our people will rule themselves. But in order to act properly, our populace must be informed. In a variety of formats, libraries offer people the concepts and data they need to educate themselves. The right to possess, receive, and transmit ideas is included in intellectual freedom.

It has been quite a while since I updated my blog here! But, there’s been many changes these past few months of 2022. Today is a great day for me to update things considering it’s about -30°F outside and I finally have a minute of time!

School has ended for me as I’ve just recently completed my degree program for Creative Writing & English. Wooh! Now to move on to other projects, tasks, and life things.

I’ve always spent a lot of my free time in libraries and I can officially say that now I’m employed at one. It’s an honor and a great pleasure for me to work for and in one of the best libraries in the country.

It’s not just my personal opinion either – this library is an award-winning library and I’m ultra happy to be there.

Due to the nature of the subject, I, unfortunately, will not be revealing exactly where. Sorry to disappoint you! Just kidding. I’m not sorry. Don’t take it personal. 😉

Since I’ve been working in the library now, I’ve learned about Intellectual Freedom – which has always been important to me despite the fact that I initially didn’t know what it was called.

According to the American Library Association,

“Intellectual freedom is the right of every individual to both seek and receive information from all points of view without restriction. It provides for free access to all expressions of ideas through which any and all sides of a question, cause or movement may be explored.”

I want to explain exactly what this means in a wonderfully creative and not-so-boring way. The account I’ll be sharing here was provided by Jamie LaRue, the current library director and the previous director of the ALA’s Office for Intellectual Freedom.

He frequently talks about the difficulties that today’s libraries face, the reasons behind these difficulties, and the function of the contemporary library.

Let’s Tell A Story

Scenario: A mother and son walk into the local library. They are browsing books and find many picture books in the kids section. The little boy picks up a book about dinosaurs and wants to check it out.

The mother says no to the little boy and tells him he can’t read the book because dinosaurs were not in the Bible, and she only wants him to learn about things that are in the Bible.

The mother refuses to check out the book for the child. She tells the library staff that she doesn’t want her son to have access to those kinds of books.

The next day, the child comes to the library alone. He goes right to the same section that he and his mother browsed the day before and picks up the book about dinosaurs.

He takes the book to the checkout and brings the book home. Shortly after, the mother arrives at the library with the son.

The mother approaches the staff and says, “You knew I didn’t want him reading this. Why did you let him?”

The library staff explains to the woman that they are not allowed to dictate to the child what he chooses to read. This, my dear friends, is INTELLECTUAL FREEDOM.

The mother is furious. She becomes enraged. She makes the boy return the book and she takes him home.

The very next day, the same little boy comes back to the library. He finds the same book about the dinosaurs and sits down in a comfy spot and starts to read it.

The library staff look at each other and observe the boy. One librarian says, “Should we take the book from him?” And the other says, “Nope. Let him read it. It’s his right.”

Now this story might not be exactly the same way Mr. LaRue told it, but I’ve told it from my memory and the lesson still does suffice. Censorship is a large problem in libraries across the country and this problem continues to grow.

In 1939 the American Library Association adopted Intellectual Freedom as part of the Library Bill of Rights.

YES, There is a Library Bill of Rights, and if you didn’t know that I hope you are just as shocked as I was when I found out and that you scream to the mountaintops about it now that you know!

What is the Library Bill of Rights?

The Library Bill of Rights is a statement issued by the American Library Association that expresses library users’ rights to intellectual freedom as well as the association’s expectations of libraries to respect those rights. To view, the Library Bill of Rights visit the ALA and click here: Library Bill of Rights | Advocacy, Legislation & Issues (ala.org)

The measure, first proposed in 1938 by library director Forrest Spaulding, was intended to speak out against “increasing intolerance, repression of free speech, and censorship harming the rights of minorities and individuals.”

The Library Bill of Rights is critically important to every American citizen because it is correlated to the freedoms guaranteed by the First Amendment.

Free and easy access to information is significantly aided by the provision of library services that are supported by public funds.

With the First Amendment being considered, one would think that Book Bans are not that serious – but in fact, they are.

Did you know that fairy tales in general are one of the most challenging genres for book bans and censorship? These older tales are being contested, as opposed to more recent and diverse works.

Some readers simply don’t enjoy works that contradict their own particular beliefs. They take action and work to have books banned and taken out of libraries if a book contradicts their own personal beliefs. To me, that is absolutely unacceptable.

Here’s a question. Would you rather:

A. Have your children study skills and gather information in a secure environment like a library?

B. Find out information alone and on the street?

For me, the answer is clear and simple. A. It will always be A.

Why Are Fairy Tales Being Censored? Are Parents Really Attempting to Ban Fairy Tales?

YES. They certainly are. And with the research and information by LaRue, I’ll tell you why. Do you remember the story of Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf?

Of course, you do – it’s a classic. In some variations of the story, the old grandmother drinks wine. Dun, dun, dun! Believe it or not – to some people this is “promoting alcoholism to children.” Granny must be an alcoholic!

With all due respect, if a wolf just tried to eat me or disguise himself and try to eat my family member, I feel like more than a glass of wine is appropriate as a coping mechanism for such a drastic situation. LaRue touches on this subject in more depth in the Personal Values and Institutional Purpose: Intellectual Freedom Issues in 2022 video which can be viewed for free on YouTube.

Real fairy tales are spooky and sinister, but that’s how they should be. Books create imaginative defenses against the ailments and threats of the outside world. We get stronger as readers. These trivial objections aim to downplay the book’s profound meaning. Whether or not someone else’s opinions or ideas align with our own personal beliefs, it is up to us, as readers and leaders, to resist censorship and constantly promote intellectual freedom!

REAL FAIRY TALES ARE NOT MEANT TO BE SUNSHINE AND RAINBOWS

To kind of sum up my feelings about classic fairy tales, I will say this. Real fairy tales are spooky and sinister, but that’s how they should be. Books create imaginative defenses against the ailments and threats of the outside world. We get stronger as readers.

These trivial objections aim to downplay the book’s profound meaning. Whether or not someone else’s opinions or ideas align with our own personal beliefs, it is up to us, as readers and leaders, to resist censorship and constantly promote intellectual freedom!

HOW TO UNITE AGAINST BOOK BANS AND CENSORSHIP

We all lose when books are banned.

Important resources that would help students better comprehend themselves and the world around them are inaccessible to them. If parents don’t pay attention, they could miss out on important teaching moments with their children. And communities miss out on a chance to grow and develop mutual appreciation and understanding.

Although attempts to censor books are nothing new, 2021 saw more of them than any year in the more than two decades since the American Library Association began keeping records.
UniteAgainstBookBans.org

Keep yourself informed. Stay informed on what is going on in the municipal councils, school boards, and library boards in your area as well as the state legislature in where you serve.

Send your mayor, state and federal legislators, and senators letters explaining your perspective and asking them to support your position. Attend the board meetings of the schools and libraries in your area.

If you’ve enjoyed this post let me know in the comments. If you have any questions or suggestions on future topics you’d like to see me write about let me know! Thanks for stopping by. #READBANNEDBOOKS

To learn more about how YOU can fight for your RIGHT TO READ visit www.uniteagainstbookbans.org

By the way, check out this really awesome beanie I designed 🙂 READ BANNED BOOKS Embroidered Beanie by Bookages – Etsy

ACCESS TO MORE RESOURCES:

Unite Against Book Bans

The Mist of Skógar

Experiences, Poetry, Travel

I can taste the mist and sense the air beneath my skin.
Shadowed by the spirits who kiss me in the wind.
When the cold air blows; I hear their stories told.

They tell me to close my eyes, and in the darkness I’ll see.
Unseen cyphers and traditions they teach are boundless and bold.
In exchange I left them my heart and they keep it for infinity; in the mist of Skógar.

Skógafoss Waterfall in Iceland by KimberlyAnneInc.

Room 121

Experiences, Poetry, Thoughts

Room 121 – a Tribute to the Mule

Narrative Poem by @kimberlyanneinc

Welcome. Before you begin reading this narrative poem, I want to say thank you for being here. Room 121 is a place that you have been to before. It is a place that we have all been to before, in some way or another. It is up to you to determine what Room 121 is about. Room 121 is a diverse room filled with every kind of energy and emotion that is possible for human beings to demonstrate and feel. Room 121 is full of mysteries that are not meant to be solved. Room 121 is what you want it to be.

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Room 121 – a Tribute to the Mule

What’s going to happen in Room 121?
I swore to myself the last time we were there that I’d never set foot in a courthouse again.
You know it was not supposed to happen this way.
Like an out of body experience I see the stupid happy plastered look on my face.
Walking with you like I should be so proud when in fact I should have
hid my face.
Then maybe now I wouldn’t be so embarrassed
and ashamed of being associated with your name.
Almost reaching Room 121 I’ve practically crumbled and just might
disintegrate.

What will happen in Room 121?
In Room 121 I’ll become brand new and it’s going to be like I never even knew you.
Remember that moment in Cinderella? There’s a fairy godmother who completes the impossible.
She made it all possible for a transformation to take place. Can you see the wand now waving?
Waving around now right in front of her face? A transformation I’ll go
through even though I think really, it’s you who needs one too and
you probably need it much more than me since you have issues with your eyes,
your ears, and all things. You need glasses so you can see. A hearing aid so you can listen.

What is going to take place in Room 121?
If only a real fairy godmother exists, then she could help me help you!
With this issue of vision.
Helping you would be much too kind considering there is no hope for you anyway. In Room 121
I will release all of the pain
and the guilt
and the misery
and the shame -
along with all of your lies and your undiagnosed illnesses
and that fake bit of chivalry that brays out of you like a True ass.

In Room 121 I will walk in alone and I won’t mind at all because I’ll be one step closer to
escaping any thought of you
for the rest of my life.

Sometimes I wonder if the world only knew
how weak and infantile you truly are
if it would
HELP.

Do you think it will be beautiful in Room 121?
Then they’d be able to escape you too; but like me they wouldn’t have to run
because you’d already be gone.
Faster and faster just like a marathon
of foolishness and mental fragility due to your frail existence.
In Room 121 donning silver attire, I will walk in with pride and
explain my mistakes of how I fell for your
schemes,
your strategies
and your lies
and how
NOW
they have made me only so much more indestructible -
Rugged and impenetrable either through the heart or unmentionables, thank you. Thank. You.
My armor is heavy, and my battle scars are unseen. Only those who wear this armor too will
understand what that means.
With my head held high and curious eyes glaring at the gleam
that my iron shield, metal plate, and inlaid sword bring -
everyone will know that you are not a real King.

Just another imitation descended from swindlers and shams, who could only hope and dream to move on to better things
instead of constantly being masters of the masquerade. I’m sorry you were built that way.

The crudeness of my words, is veracious as your credentials
of being extremely detrimental.

The fact that you are a mule, and one that is destructive is comical to say the least.
Being a tool is exactly the purpose of such an animal. Stubborn and a certified beast
of burden -
of this I’m certain.

As I lift the helmet off of my head, and start to remove my sheathing, the verdict is reached and now I am breathing. A sigh of relief blasted out of my chest knowing that I was heard and that your cowardice
made it all so easy.

Sailing out now of Room 121
I go away and in search of anything that isn’t you
for eternity now.
Sailing out now of Room 121,
off and away there I go, here I go, to anything or anyone that isn’t you
forever now.

Sailing out now with my armor, weapons, and my ship, hands on my waist with the hips you will miss -
farther than ever so you can never taste my lips
again.

Assailant should have been your title once long ago, but you can’t be called that anymore.
You’ve lost this battle and I’ve won the war. Now thanks to Room 121 I am perpetually
unassailable. And when the truth hits the ears of all who will listen, this is how the tale will go.

Thank you for reading. If you’re a rebel writer, let me know what literary devices you can spot in this poem. I’d love to hear from you. ❤ ‘Til then, happy writing!

Nixie

Experiences, Poetry, Thoughts

Do you remember the first time you brought your newborn home from the hospital? Your first baby. Do you remember counting every breath? Feeling their chest? Putting your ear next to their tiny little lips that would one day ask, “WHY?”

I’ve recalled that feeling and lived it again. But this time with no bassinet, no crib, no play pen. Instead I’m laying on the bathroom floor, worried sick. Counting breaths per second as the clock ticks. As I think of my foolish ways, and the dismay that was brought on by today, I ponder it all as I stare at my new stray. With all that I can and all I’ve got, an offering should take place.

She’s eating and breathing and drinking which is a relief. Considering her condition, as told by the vet it’s somewhat of a rendition of – well, I don’t even need to tell. You already know. She’s mostly silver, grayish, kinda blue. She has a tiny white patch on her chest too. Her eyes are the darkest green, but somehow resemble emeralds or jade that have been spun into a galaxy that lives in her gaze.

Mystic as she is no matter what is wrong, I’ll treat her like my own and sing her all the songs. The ones I always chant to the other two I have, like a ritual I plant and water what I can.

Filled her water several times, because she kept drinking and drinking. Water is a gift of life, primordial and consistently. Thinking and thinking, I call her Nixie. Tiny little sprite, washing everything down. I watch her, observing as she circles around. 9 times like the waters of Styx. If she has 9 lives, then I hope they let me have – at least one.

I hope she doesn’t go yet, because we’ve only just begun. But if she has to take her journey, she won’t do it alone. Precious little Nixie Styx, this can be your new home. ✨

Celestial Windows©

Experiences, Mythology, Poetry

Celestial Windows© – a Prose Poem by KimberlyAnneInc

Running again I see you chasing me. Is it impossible for me to see without eyes on the back of my head? I’m cornered as you climb through the window to get inside. The tiny little white square window that you somehow managed to open. How can you fit inside? In a world where nothing is solid of course, it makes sense. You push your way through and seep inside like liquid. This is impossible but you have your ways. I cannot escape and I’m trapped. Pushed into the corner and the walls made of light brown wood melted and pushed into me right back. You’ve done this many times and when I try to run you always catch me. Sometimes I want to make up with you but I know that when I do it will always end the same. It always ends the same. You grab the cell phone out of my hand. You question me again. You corner me. You squeeze me and it hurts. You do not let me go. In fear and fright, I scream and I cry but only in a way that I can recognize. You are not able to see. The walls start to melt around us as they push us closer together like flowing waters against rock pushing, pushing, pushing, until the imprints are made, the curves are present on the gray cold stone. Exactly what I don’t want. In terror, I freeze. I won’t let you see it. Smile at you so I can play tricks too just like you. I wish I could be like you. I want to crawl out of the window that you climbed in but my feet do not work. Solid like a cold gray stone. How can I escape this moment? The only thing that is left for me to do is wake. Wake. At my wake, they will stand vigil.

They will stand watch like Cerberus who barks in the lot. Watching and waiting like I will wake up. Wake. I just want to wake. Up. Lately, I’ve been so down. Like the pits within the earth, the ones that are covered in green moss and brown dirt. How much farther can I go? Digging and digging, below. Picking the colors from the earth as I become the meadow and picking at my flesh; this is what I do now. I pick them and dig. I cry out for Charon, please come and help. Escaping this place is what I must do. Digging and digging I want to go. I’ve had my wake and I cannot wake, take me across the waters made of souls dark and light and warm and cold. The agony above somehow compares to Theogony of all. Styx pushes and it melts but it’s nothing like you, not even with all of its shadows. Yours tops it all as a veil over the sun.

Running again the craft of Charon cruises down the bed made of spirit as it carries me to a castle. Here you will find me but you certainly won’t catch me. I’ve found something much more powerful than you but only in the most fervent way. Abducting myself to travel to another realm with a barrier in between and live with all of the things unseen. It’s better this way I think while passing through Elysium and the Meadows of Asphodel. Finally making my way through after many journeys I find myself in Tartarus which somehow is better than being Up and awake and in the presence of you. Persephone may want to run and if she does I hope she comes to you. I will send her myself and then take her place and look into the eyes of a god who can’t be worse than you. Hades would stand with a seraphic grin as I tell him all of the things and with his own celestial windows bearing his spirit I’d feel safe and warm in this otherworldly underworldly place that is somehow swarming with the ice of frozen souls but none would compare to you. Tired no more I wouldn’t run. No longer can I see you chasing me. I’m too busy filling bowls with seeds of pomegranate fruit and all on my own because it’s all much better than you. Shoving the seeds into my mouth and swallowing them down, planting myself there forever so that I never see you again but somehow if I do in this world they will already know you. Seeds, all of the seeds make it easier for me. You can run now I am the Queen and in the realm of the dead in the far depths of the Underworld, I am more alive than ever. This new sweet taste of disposition is something I envision Cupid’s bow and arrow would never be vigorous enough to create as I stare into the celestial windows.

Places: How They Influence Us

Experiences, Thoughts, Travel

Within the last couple of years, I have transformed; mentally and emotionally. Some of the things I did before the pandemic were unhealthy and questionable. I mean very mentally and emotionally unhealthy. I was around people who were just not good for me and my mental and spiritual health was on a decline because of it. During the pandemic, and with tons of time to be alone I had an epiphany of sorts. After realizing I had almost wasted my life with an individual who was completely toxic for me, I realized that I truly wasn’t living my life the way that I should have been or could be doing. Realizing that, I decided to make the most out of my 2021, once many COVID restrictions started to lift.

Last year I went on some truly amazing adventures and discovered so many new places and met some lovely new people. At this point, I’m not a stranger to traveling alone. I find that traveling alone is extremely beneficial and something that everyone should do at least once in their life. I don’t mean traveling for work either, or something tedious. I mean to go, across the country, or the world – completely by yourself and for only one purpose: leisure.

Last year, by the power of fate I made it to Iceland twice, Omaha, Nebraska (Nebriowa), and St. Louis, Missouri. I feel like I’m forgetting something, but if I remember I’ll be sure to come back and write about it. I did go to Roswell, but that was for a family visit and something I’ll discuss later on. Traveling for me is all about exploration of the world and exploration of myself. It might not seem like a lot to some, but the places I went to and the things that I saw last year have given me memories that will last a lifetime. Traveling makes you realize just how tiny you are in this giant and overpopulated world.

Seeing Mt. Esja, among many other beauties in Iceland for the first time, was breathtaking. I did, of course, see some epic waterfalls, ate fermented shark (and didn’t puke, haha Gordon Ramsay!), and even saw one of my favorite artists perform. On top of that, I even went to Álfaskólinn, the official Elf School of Iceland, and was lucky enough to sit with a historian and listen to stories of magic and folklore (my favorite!).

When traveling to Nebraska, I stood in two states at the same time while on top of the Bob Kerry Pedestrian bridge where I witnessed a marriage proposal at sunset. It was so romantic, and I was thrilled to have captured photos of the moment. (The Bob Kerrey Pedestrian Bridge is a 3,000-foot footbridge across the Missouri River between Council Bluffs, Iowa, and Omaha, Nebraska.) I did send the photos I got to the couple after their special moment. I rode a bicycle up and down the Lewis and Clark National Historic Trail. The feeling of connecting with nature and history brought me such pleasure and it’s a magical place I’ll never forget. On the trail, I slowed down so I could witness a musical performance taking place on the side of the river. I saw the Durham Museum and listened to stories of military men and the brave Standing Bear. I was shocked and heartbroken at learning things about Standing Bear and his people, that they never would teach us in school. At the Joslyn Art Museum, I discovered an epic Dutch painter, Maria Van Oosterwijck. I ate the best fish tacos I’ve ever had in my life at Voodoo Taco. I wish all of the time, they’d open one up in Chicago.

I rode all over downtown Omaha by myself on those little stand-up electric scooters and let my hair blow in the wind as I cruised the streets, examining the architecture and statues of pioneers and buffalo. Somehow I managed to make my way to a concert of roughly 70,000 people in the middle of a field that looked more like a valley than anything. It was one of the hottest days of the year, and I had no idea how I’d get back to where I was lodging. Luckily, I met a beautiful Princess in the crowd who was from Lake Okoboji. She told me about where she was from, and how people always looked confused when she said “Lake Okoboji”. It is a glacier lake that was formed 14,000 years ago by the Wisconsin Glacier and has a maximum depth of 136 feet, making it Iowa’s deepest natural lake. Bri, or Bree, if you ever read this, just know that I think you are a genuine and beautiful human being. It’s mysterious that we never exchanged contact info after hanging out and demolishing curly fries after the concert. Thank you for helping me get back into town so safely. In my mind, I’d like to think it’s because we are both Midwestern chicks who were looking out for each other that night. She initially came up to me and started chatting because, for a moment, she too was in the crowd alone.

For my son’s birthday, we drove to St. Louis. The first time we saw the Gateway Arch, it felt incredible. Seeing things in person that you’ve only read about in books or on the internet gives you this indescribable feeling! It’s like yes, we finally made it. My son particularly loved St. Louis and Missouri in general. Especially when we drove out to the Meremac Caverns and learned about the hideout spots of Jesse James. Seeing the caverns all lit up felt like being in a dream. We got to explore a part of the earth that so many other people haven’t been able to see. We also spent time at the City Museum, and it was one of the most interesting places I’ve ever seen. Everything constructed at the City Museum comes from old pieces, parts, and random works of art that were once part of the city of St. Louis. Inside the City Museum, which is both equally fun for adults and children, you can investigate the unthinkable. I rescued a toddler while there who had apparently gotten lost. I found her crying in some loft (there are literally secret compartments all over that museum). Thankfully, her parents found her once I brought her back to the front desk! It was still wild though, considering each child gets a wristband and their parents are supposed to write their phone numbers on them! There was no phone number on hers, which made me super disappointed. My mom instincts kicked in super hard!

The City Museum is a hundred-year-old warehouse where artists have recycled the remains of the past to create miles of tunnels, slides, and climbers as well as bridges, castles, and other structures. There are secret caves inside, giant halls, and more tunnels than you can ever imagine. On top of the building, there is even a school bus on the roof and a Ferris wheel. Some of our time was also spent at the Magic House Museum in Kirkwood, MO. The Magic House is a non-profit organization that provides hands-on exhibitions and educational activities that are tailored to the specific interests and requirements of children and their families. In addition to field excursions, STEAM evenings for families, scout programs, and summer camps, the Museum provides a range of interactive learning opportunities that encourage and inspire kids of all ages toward becoming successful learners.

This is just a tiny snippet of what I’ve experienced last year in my “free time”. The point is, all of these places shape what I know, who I am, and how I see the world. Every time we discover a new place, we discover something about ourselves. We discover something about humanity. As much as humans seem impossible, experiencing new things and new places gives you a chance to discover the good that is left in humanity. In St. Louis, I was shocked at the hospitality we received at one restaurant. It was genuine, it was real. It wasn’t that fake smile or fake voice that many servers here in the city pull.

In the city, when I was growing up one of my favorite hideout spots was the Montrose Bird Sanctuary. The Montrose Bird Sanctuary is a quiet preserve that is home to a diverse range of migrating songbirds and butterflies, and it also has a skyline view. When I was younger I thought it should have just been called the Butterfly Sanctuary. The last time I was there, sadly, I did not see so many butterflies. There were plenty of tall grasses and trees to hide in and around. Maybe I loved the spot due to my obsession with nature which I’m going to blame on books of my childhood like, “The Giving Tree”, for example. Or even “Goodnight Moon”. Growing up with books that taught about nature, the stars, and altruism – one shouldn’t be surprised that a favorite hiding spot of mine is just next to the shores of Lake Michigan where you can easily hide in trees. It looks much different now than it did back then. Even though it’s changed so much, it will always be one of my favorite spots. I went back and visited last year, and found a single rose floating in the lake. I considered it as a message from one of my most loved and missed friends.

Near Montrose Harbor, Chicago IL (I promise you, I did not put that rose there!)

I’ve been incredibly lucky to experience so many things. This year, I can only imagine what else I will find. Taking none of this for granted is critical to the importance and the extent of my appreciation for all of the magical things in this world.

Relationships & Intimacy

Experiences

Relationship and intimacy are both words that everyone is aware of. We all know what those words mean, right? Of course! But the thing is with these words, not all of us have the same definition for those words. The word relationship can mean romantic, familial, or even friendship. It just depends on how YOU look it. The same thing with intimacy. When you think of intimacy, the first idea that comes to your mind might not be the same idea that first comes to another. There’s nothing wrong with this, but the main thing we can conclude from these two words is their importance in our lives.

When I think of relationships from my past, many people come to my mind. Not just in a romantic way. I think of family relationships, friendships, and people who have been in my life for a long time, or a short period of time. The word relationship can be applied to many connections, not just romantic ones. It seems that people can be confused by that concept, or downright disagree. Not every person you vibe with needs to lay in your bed! There can be some sort of relationship without a sexual element. There are a few different relationship types I can think of, each of them providing its own form of intimacy.

Family relationships.
Friendships.
Acquaintances.
Romantic relationships.
Sexual relationships.
Work relationships.
Situational relationships

When riding the waves of life, you are bound to experience some, if not most of these. This list of relationships just makes me think of a kid walking into a candy shop. He can pick and choose whatever he’d like since there are so many. In reality, though, do we really get to pick and choose our relationships and what type of relationship they are? Or who they are with? Sometimes. It all depends.

When it comes to family, for me personally, I was not brought up with very many positive family relationships. Most of the time, I was surrounded by people or experiences that I was able to learn from whether they were a positive or negative factor in my life. Each family experience I’ve had has made me a better person, and I wouldn’t change anything.

When it comes to friends, I think I was lucky! I have an abundant amount of them, even if some I’ve never met personally (which is quite acceptable in this technological era we live in). And by abundant, I mean in quality – not quantity. There is truly a major difference between the two. I’d take a quality friendship over quantity any day.

With romantic relationships, I’ve had a few serious ones. Sometimes I wonder about certain relationships I’ve had, and I think that I’ve experienced true love so young that I shouldn’t bother even searching for it anymore because I know what it feels like.

Work relationships often can turn out like family if you so choose. I’ve had it happen, and one of my best friends started out with a work relationship.

Situational relationships do exist. Yes, many of us are “guilty” of those. As much as we judge others, we should also be looking at our own selves. It’s important to look within yourself, instead of focusing on others or trying to put a spotlight on their problems. Everyone is guilty of something.

When thinking of who my best friend is, a couple people come to mind. The first one is my son. The second one is someone dear, who lives in another time zone. The third is someone completely untouchable. The fourth is a friend of mine from a former workplace. She helped me through many things in my life and always gives the best advice. I’m so grateful for her and her logic! Although we don’t talk as much as we once did, my love for her will absolutely never change.

Sometimes we have a tendency to stay in relationships that we should have left, YESTERDAY. Yes, I am the first to admit there was a relationship I spent too long in. I’m positive many people can relate to that. I spent too much time in two of them actually. When I did that, it really caused me to lose myself in someone else. (Never doing that again.) They were both really good learning lessons for me. The thought of staying together “for the kids” is what many people think is the right thing to do. In some cases, it could be the opposite. There are also times when we have this tendency to rush in relationships. I’ve rushed things in my past. What I learned from it is to never do that again. Relationships of all kinds have many ups and downs. It’s just important to maintain balance.

Some people are just strategically placed into your life at certain times. It feels that way at least, doesn’t it? My favorite friendship story is the one where I met one of my best friends at work. The story is great because our friendship was real and natural, and we bonded like sisters. We’ve even spent holidays together! There’s nothing better in this world than true genuine friendships with deep connections.

Deeply connected means mental/intellectual, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and sexual connections (in some relationships). When you are deeply connected to someone you will have the ability to vibe on every single level. Since I’ve experienced feelings like this before, I’d never settle for less again. My role in such a deeply connected relationship would be to give what I want to receive; To listen but also to teach! To me, these deeply rooted connections are the truest form of intimacy.

T-Shirt For Your Thoughts

Experiences, Poetry, Psychology

I'm wearing your t-shirt again. 
It hangs off my body
Flows down past my hips, 
And covers barely enough. 

I'm In your t-shirt again. 
Lying in bed. 
There's lots of room, 
More than enough. 

I'm wearing your t-shirt again .
It's the only thing I've got. 
To help me feel like I'm not alone. 
But it's never enough. 

I'm In your t-shirt again. 
Pondering to myself 
How All of it happened; 
Wishing you were here. 
It's just Way too much. 

I'm wearing your t-shirt again. 
I washed it the other day, 
Put some extra bleach to keep it white. 
Just how you like. 

It doesn't smell like you. 
Not anymore. 
But it brings me solace, 
While I lay on the floor. 
The bed is too empty,
Unlike my head.  

By myself -  
Yet another night. 
The snow is dancing around. 
Like powdered sugar, 
It's soft and bright. 
Glowing in the night. 

Just like this t-shirt 
That you gave me. 
So, I could always have it, 
To remind myself of you. 

Staring in the mirror, 
At the curves of my legs, 
Looking at these threads, 
That cover me, just me - 
As I count the days. 

But it's simply not enough. 
No. 
It isn't. 
It won't be until you can 
Be here with me. 

With how the seasons 
Have passed. 
I wonder. 
If it will ever be enough. 

Until then, 
I will be here. 
Sitting accompanied 
With only Thought and Memory. 
Trying to reason. 
Living. 
The Loneliest of heathens. 
Wearing your t-shirt again,
Until it becomes almost like skin.

He Knew

Experiences, Poetry

He knew she was beautiful. 
Clearly, he could see. 
But her beauty is not all he saw. 
What he saw, made him stand out to her. 
What he saw, made himself in return, be seen. 
It made her look. 
She knew. 

He saw much deeper than the surface. 
He saw inside of her. 
The mystic that was her soul. 
The darkness that was her heart. 
The brilliance that was her mind. 
He knew that those other superficial things, 
That existed in their world,
Meant nothing to her. 

Somehow, nobody could really see her. 
Unless it was him. 
She was all alone. 
Unseen. But no, not to him. 
Only he had the eyes 
That had the power to see, 
Her visionary and gallivant spirit. 
The wandering and traveling force 
That was buried inside of her 
From the weight of 
All the things.  
She loved him for that. 

She loved him for the way that he could see her. 
Like nobody else could. 
He knew.

Tragedies As A Catapult

Experiences, Psychology, Thoughts

Endings almost always lead to beginnings. In my experience, it seems that way. There’s been a few times in my life where something ending has put me on a completely different path, leading me to brand new and often exciting experiences. Whether these endings came in the form of relationships, jobs, or even the deaths of loved ones, they transformed me as an individual in their own different ways. Each experience contributed to the web that is my life.

Tragedies and new beginnings are often interwoven like an intricate web of fibers bearing all different kinds of colors.

Tragedies and new beginnings are often interwoven like an intricate web of fibers bearing all different kinds of colors. Each color and each fiber represent a different aspect of life. Life has this way about it that can leave us confused, questioning everything, or really trying to find our purpose. Ironically, its counterpart, Death, leaves us wondering many of the same things.

Part of our purpose, I believe, is to learn and grow while we are here on earth. We cannot grasp new ideas and flourish if we do the same routine things every day of our life. That must be why we suffer tragedies and have pain and sorrow. It must be why, right? Without these tragedies would we truly be ourselves? Who would be? We become stronger and more resilient with each new beginning that is presented to us by a tragedy.

In my last post, I discussed grief and people who I’ve lost that have impacted my life tremendously. When thinking of them, there is someone who I lost that comes to mind specifically, and losing this person really was a catapult for me to enter into a new beginning. After experiencing such a devastating loss, I was transformed.

In a way, I entirely reshaped my existence and what I’ve done with my time. The tragedy was my catapult to start endless amounts of creation in the form of art and writing, and just simply living my life the exact and precise way that I wanted to; with absolutely nothing holding me back.

There is another time when a friend and I were on separate paths in life for about seven or eight years. We did not speak for the entire duration of those years. Something magical happened that suddenly brought us together, and from that tragedy (separation), we were able to start a new beginning. The fibers of our webs once again became intertwined, thus causing a new bond. New beginnings are quite possibly one of my favorite things. I even have a tattoo dedicated to such meaning. Similar to the balance of darkness and light, fortune and misfortune are opposite yet closely related. There is an awakening that happens with new beginnings, like the break of dawn after a long dark night. You cannot have one without the other. Maintaining balance is important.

There have been plenty of times where I’ve had a fresh start. One of the most recent situations I can recall where I’ve had to “start over” was after getting married in a rush, and then getting divorced. When I think of it now, it seems so ridiculous. The choice I made could be considered a mistake. However, if I did not choose to get married, and then go through a divorce, I would certainly not be where I am now. So like those little colorful fibers are woven into the web of my life, how could this be a mistake? The divorce led me to another new beginning and I’m now at a point in my life where I know exactly who I am mentally and spiritually, and exactly where I’m going. Gratitude for the entirety of the situation is a complete understatement of my feelings. Whereas, before, I was just kind of going through the motions of life and not exactly sure about anything. I was still learning how to be me. This tragedy that I suffered through, and the fact that I went through my own depression was absolutely worth it. I wouldn’t wish the pain on anyone, or the confusion, or just downright nastiness of what I’d experienced, but everything that has happened has made me such a better person than I was before.

Breathe. It will all work out in the end.

In my experience, when things don’t work out it is a sign that things are actually working out. It may sound kind of crazy or silly, but I promise it is true. Some doors are just meant to be closed, and that is okay. In one of my favorite books, by Icelandic author Gunnar Andri, something he said in the book has stood out in my mind for several years now. “When one door closes, another opens. And sometimes many of them open at the same time.” Correct! I do agree with him on this statement, as well as much of the wisdom inside of his book. (5/5 stars, I definitely recommend)

And when those doors do open, taking the opportunity to walk through them can seem frightening or challenging. The thing is, with a new start, you must not be afraid. Of course, being scared of change or doing something new is a natural human emotion. Humans don’t like change. It’s been proven. Sometimes though, change is exactly what we need. A new path is given to us at the worst time, which in reality often can be the best time. There have been so many positive things that have happened to me since my divorce or other designated tragedies, and I recall the feeling of starting new friendships and relationships with other people after these terrible situations happened. I’m happier than I’ve ever been and I truly do believe that if the tragedies didn’t happen, I really wouldn’t be on the path I am now. It’s an amazing feeling.

If you’re ever feeling like you are living in total despair, or you just simply can’t move on from a situation or a certain someone, I’m here to tell you that you certainly can. It’s absolutely possible. When your tragedy hits, surely there will be flowers that will bloom shortly after.

Things to Remember:

Don’t be scared to end something
Don’t be nervous about experiencing your own tragedy (It will make you stronger)
Don’t be intimidated about trying something new
Do try to meet new people, learn from them
Change is a good thing sometimes
Take every opportunity presented to you (It’s there for a reason)
Find your balance between dark and light
Remember that everything will work out in the end
Tragedies and new beginnings are interwoven; everything is connected

New beginnings can be hard, and learning something new that you’ve never done before certainly can be a challenge. In the garden of your life, just make sure to tend to the flowers that bloom after the storm; not the weeds.

Kimberly Anne Inc.

Content Writer | Web Builder | Creative Business Consultant

Experiences

What Is Intellectual Freedom? – Libraries & The Right To Read